Single Steps Strategies Blog

When a Man is Definitely NOT a Plan

“Man accused of murdering wife of 42 years after she questioned him on finances.”

Recently I came across an article about a man who called the police saying he had found his wife unresponsive in their home. He was eventually charged with her murder. Authorities allege that he killed his wife after she began asking questions about their financial situation. He stabbed her multiple times after she realized there were various discrepancies in their financial statements. Although he had statements for one account showing $97,000, the actual value was $90. She discovered that another account that she believed the husband had opened for them never really existed.

When couples marry, the union is like starting a small business. Both partners bring their skills to the arrangement, and one may be better at handling finances. But although one may be better at decorating, or planning vacations, couples usually meet and talk about the decisions that are made. So just like a small business that has monthly review meetings or annual progress meetings, couples should do the same with their finances.

For women, having a handle on the finances can be a great safety net, as many women stay in abusive relationships as they fear they have no access to money. Having a savings account, investment account and retirement account of your own gives you independence, and options. It can also be a safety net if your spouse becomes disabled or dies.

See that you both are adequately insured. Plan for contingencies.

Also be very aware of any credit card debt. If your spouse defaults on a loan or credit card payment, you can be held responsible. If your spouse is reluctant to share information with you, this can be a red flag.

Just a reminder that relationships can end either by choice or by chance. Here’s hoping that yours will last until the end of time, but just in case…

Mary Grace Musuneggi

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